this is for you, jie. For all the times when you aren't online. MY blog about My life, for YOU.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

pen vs keyboard

I remember saying at the beginning of the year that i loathed the computer and that nothing could ever replace the good Ole pen and paper as an instrument of my thoughts. however, things have changed so irrevocably and rapidly that whenever i try to write poetry with a pen it doesn't seem to FLOW anymore. For that matter, i can't even write in my diary without feeling that my feelings are clogged by my handwriting. I have much ado with regard to my handwriting. Because i write with the paper at a 90 degree angle to me, my eyesight has been deteriorating quite significantly lately. as such, i find it necessary to change my writing position. however, upon doing so, my handwritting becomes seriously skewed. Now, instead of slantly nicely the the right like a generous person (according to evelyn, peopl who's handwritting slants to the right are generous), it now slants very badly to the left. Thus, i am Mister Scrooge whenever i attempt to correct my handwritting.
Seriously, i have a stiff, inflexible WEAK wrist or something. I can't play tennis or golf without straining my wrist, and neither can i write like a normal, SANE person, with the paper STRAIGHT in front of me. I wish my parents/ teachers had been like the shanghai ones, who forced their kids into beautious penmanship by making them write with back straights, paper straight and holding the pen in the correct position. Yes, there is a correct position for holding a pen. I, for the past 15 years, have been writing in the wrong position, which justly accounts for the bump on my right middle finger. The correct position, mind, is by holding the pen so that the tip of your index finger just touches the pen, and it rests at the FRONT of your third finger, and your thumb touches the pen around the same area. i, on the other hand, support my pen a little higher up, at the knuckle region, and so now i have a bump on my knuckle.
OH, and guess what? I have, for the past three months, successfuylly kept long nails. It is a sign that i am maturing. DON'T LAUGH, jie. i know it sounds VERY familiar, but this time, it is justified. two years ago, in fact, even a year ago, had i tried to keep my nails long, i'd just have ended up looking goth, going around with blackened fingernails due to a gross accumulation of dirt underneath my nails (that is, if i had bothered to try). Now, they stay safely immaculate unless i do sports and my rash acts up and i have to scratch. Which, in my present coach potato status, is VERY unlikely.
I NEED TO EXERCISE. Jie, serious, this time i am not lying to you, or going anorexic on you, I AM FAT. you will ogle at how fat i am if you saw me. STRANGELY, i have not gained weight. But that is only a matter of time. as my muscles degenerate and my fats accumulate... it won't be long before i have to revamp my wardrobe, AGAIN. After exams, i am going on a crash burning of fats, and up my stamina and fitness like crazy. I WILL NOT STAY FAT. But for now, i shall lull my fats into a false sense of security, all the while preparing a powerful pschological attacking strategy that will make me anorexic. MUAHAHAHA. i was joking. about the anorexic part ONLY, though.
HMM, i have deviated quite a bit from the topic, haven't i? See why i HAVE to write a sucky arguementative essay for chinese compo? unless i get some lovely topic like "MU AI" or something lame.

Saturday, September 24, 2005

update

I've just read nezzie's blog, and SHE STILL SOUNDS LIKE NEZ!!!! YAY! I confess to have been mortally afraid that she'd go over there and turn into... into... whatever they are there. I know i sound prejudiced and all, but it's not my fault if americans choose to misrepresent themselves through their books, tv and radio. I mean, you can forgive one trashy american book for being trashy, but a whole collection of them??
I've just finished reading a Meg Cabot book, called Teen Idol. Everytime i read a Meg Cabot book, I end up feeling very very stupid. Not because of the wealth of intellect that i read about that makes me feel insignificant, but because i was stupid enough to believe that Meg Cabot would show a slice of originality in THIS book. She has this fixation with plots that go along the lines of HEY, i am an original girl, like, until something HUGE happens to me, like i turn out to be a PRINCESS, or i save the PRESIDENT, or i show the TEEN IDOL around town. And whilst i do all these glorious things, i meet hot hunks that i totally fall for, but in the end, i always choose the nice quiet guy who has always been by my side. With minor variations in each book. SERIOUSLY, why do i even bother reading it???
ANYWAY, the minute exams are over, i will
a) go shopping. DUH.
b) buy all the birthday presents that i owe to half the world
c)go rockclimbing
d) hit the gym, swimming pool, track and nature reserve. I MUST GET BACK INTO SHAPE< NZ ADVENTURE CAMP IS LESS THAN TWO MONTHS AWAY!! (pardon the caps, it is addictive)
e)go dancing:)
f) read men at arms and find out who Carrot and Angua is. Yes, nez, u've got me intrigued
g)think of stuff for next year's SIA so i don't DIE next year.

OOPS. okay, RIGHT at the top of that list is: PLAN FOR MISSION TRIP, except that i forgot to add it. BUT IT IS THERE.
stomach calls! Rather, mum does.

Friday, September 23, 2005

crossing the bridge

Today, while i was walking to the chinese high bus stop, i saw two little sec one chinese high boys (at leat i HOPE that the are sec 1) running to catch the bus. They were really funny! As the ran, their pockets, stuffed with whatever little boys carry around, were flapping against their bare, skinny legs. they had stuffed it so FULL that they bulged out from under their pants, and when they ran, you could see two white bags thunking against their legs rhythmically. It's really amazing, considering that chinese high boys are famed for their tight pants... there was actually space for the pockets to flap about....O.o Goes to show how skinny they are.
just thought you'd think it wass funny. My description sucks, but with your lovely imagination, you'll get it!!

Monday, September 19, 2005

story writing

i just got back the romance story i wrote for chinese compo. We were supposed to write a short story, and somehow, i couldn't think of anything else to write but a romance. which is pretty ironic since my experience with romance is negative. And i did quite well! or i would have, it i hadn't minused 6 marks for careless mistakes. I attribute my success to the fact that the first part of the story was drawn from a real life experience, except everything was altered a little to seem more realistic (sometimes fairytales make more sense than real life). And the ending of the story was a sweet figment of my imagination because it is extremely romantic and surreal:P Even my friends say so, okay. That's the thing about real life. although it may start out fairytale-like, do not be decieved! When everything is over, because everything WILL end, you find that the author of the fairytale was actually Grimms. You know the sadistic fairytale-writer who wrote the sad story of the little mermaid, the tin soldier, etc? I HATED them cos they made me cry. Too bad i didn't know that Grimms was a realist.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

15

So I'm fifteen. That has yet to sink in, somehow. I don't feel old enough, mature enough.
Today, in honour of my birthday, i studied physics! I know. My most hated subject. But hey, what better way to grow up than to face the challenges of life? Oh, and i went fasting from 7 to 12. To detox. heh. I kinda stopped when i realised that aunty had cooked lunch... i mean, if i didn't eat, all that good food would be wasted, wouldn't it?
But the best part of my birthday are the snippets of times when my phone buzzed, and i recieved smses wishing me Happy Birthday. I didn't know so many people KNEW it was my birthday. To me, a birthday isn't a very momentous event, and it passes by quietly. I grew up passing each birthday quietly, and so i undervalued its meaning. i realised that it WAS a nice feeling to have people remember that it is your birthday. So now i feel bad, cos i haven't really paid attention to the birthdays of the people that I care about. Maybe that's what i learnt today. The importance of being special, if it was just for one day a year.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

pole vaulting

Today's training was FUN FUN FUN!!!!
Mr Pedro taught us the basics of pole vaulting.
At first, i felt incredibly foolish clutching this bamboo pole with a tennis ball attached to the end, running with it pointing down to the floor in front of me, attempting to keep it straight.
Later, we tried to vault over a 1m hurdle, which, i assure you, looks deceptively easy, especially when Mr Pedro demonstrates it. But it was extremely fun, all the same.
Then, we went to the sandpit, and that is where things start to get GREAT. We would run towards Mr Pedro, who was holding the pole towards us, with the other end stuck firmly into the sand. then, we'd jump and grab the end, pushing off the ground and holding on for dear life while Mr Pedro hoisted us across! For those split seconds while you are in the air, you feel like you are flying, truly flying. I was grinning like an idiot, i assure you.
Then, we tried it on our own. you hold the pole just a foot off the ground and dash forward, before planting it into the sand and kicking off, and you grip the pole till you feel your two feet reaching the floor again. It is thrilling. And Ms Tan says that maybe it is my niche area... she was so hyped out by our performance that she is seriously considering investing in a pole vaulting team!!! wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee! FINALLY, i find something that i am good at in track! I am SOO motivated to train!! I must train my arms like crazy, because the pole is extremely heavy, and you have to run a good 50m with it sticking out in front of you. Please Lord, let ms tan get permission to buy the poles, and LET HER BUY THE POLES!!

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

are u really over?

Am I? really over? i touch this area of my emotions as one would touch a fresh-healed scar. I am unsure what to expect. Will i find that underneath the surface, things are still the same? Or will i find that things have healed well, with nothing but a fine scar to show? Or has my cut become infected, and grown worse than ever?
Are you really over? that's what a friend asked me. I said yes. Of course. But let me first start with stating what "over" means. It means accepting it's presence as an inevitable fact, but one that is temporal, and one that will pass. It doesn't mean forgetting, nor does it mean that everything is as it was before it happened. Because things can never be the same. The lessons i learnt from it will always stick with me through my journey of life, and it will enrich my life. Of that i am sure.
Do i still feel the same? Honestly? i don't know. One never Knows, until one wakes up one day to find that one has not thought about it for a long time, and when one thinks about it, there is this strange peace and JOY, and one is able to laugh over what has happened. Till then, u just Live.

Monday, September 12, 2005

home alone

For the next few days, i will have to navigate the route to school (and everywhere else)on my own :( Ah well, it'll be a good test of time management and coordination.
I have become an avid promoter of E_God... what can i say, it's really really good! Put it this way, I'M still going, though exams are three weeks away.
I must say that being in my class is a blessing as well as a curse. The minute i step into class, i have this great surge of motivation, especially when i peeked into evelyn's studying time table... she's finished her 1st round or rivision for the three sciences!! That girl is a breathing robot. Talk about motivation boost. Not to mention, i had sudden amnesia over the holidays, so i forgot that such a thing as homework existed, and went on happily revising my work till i realised that i had a lit essay, a source-base assignment and a math assignment to complete. So now i have to stay up late, AND wake up earlier!! darn.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Pink!

I have just recieved early birthday prezzies from my family. Honestly, gifts have never been such an important part of our lives. Mostly, birthdays pass by with a small celebration in the car as we go off to our respective institutions, and gifts are handed in at the end of the day with quiet pomp and circumstance, followed by the reciever prancing around in a thank-you dance. But this year, i must truly say that i am TOUCHED by my younger sister's gifts to me :)
In an all out attempt to turn me into a bimbo, she has bought me a HOT PINK skirt with a pink embossed Billabong pencil case, and would have bought me a pink belt, if my mother hadn't intervened. And she even bothered to wrap it up nicely in red striped paper and twine :D Isn't she sweet? And would you believe it, but i'm actually going to wear it out? It actually doesn't look too bad...!!
OH, and my mum bought me this really really cool set of hair irons, you know, the whole enchilada... crimping iron, straightener, and curler... yeah. Last night, my hair was a cascading mass of ringlets... doesn't it sound heavenly? Until i showered, that is. But to balance the whole emphasis on outward beauty, she bought me three Christian books. I've just finished reading one of them, and i have to say that i like the books better than the hairstyling set. I really LOVE the hairstyling set, mind you, it's so FUN! But when all's said and done, i'd rather be beautiful inside than outside... who wouldn't?
Today, i went for the TreeTop walk with the Faithactz kids. It was FUN! Tiring too, only you didn't really FEEL it till you sat down long enough for the fatigue to settle in. And i think my group thought i was a real pain in the neck, cos i kept going "come on! ONLY a little more! we've just got THREE stations left! LOOK, i see the next station just a little ahead! WHY DON'T we just walk a LEETLE bit faster? Come on, guys!" and stuff like that. It's one thing to do it while you are kayaking around Pulau Ubin, cos most of the time you are a) shouting at people way beyond your line of vision and b) even if you could see them, you were too busy trying to get your kayak to STAY in place to really look at their faces and see their expression. I assure you, they were giving me these "OH, shut up already! I'm TIRED, can't we STOP?" looks. But on the whole we did manage to enjoy the walk, and we GOT FIRST! Boy was i stunned when i heard that. At least i didn't waste my saliva :P
I have also realised that there are two very good spurs to get your team to walk faster. Ask the girls in a VERY LOUD voice to show some girl power (we get a nice, FAST competition between girls and boys), and ask your team to over take another team, who will then say that since we are terrapins (group name) we should walk slowly, which will then incite MY group to prove them wrong!
OH, and i have come to a conclusion that i am not scared of heights. My fear of heights stems from being highly imaginative, such that everytime i stand at any position high enough to fall down and DIE, i start imagining ways and means of my abrupt departure over the edge. And for that matter, anyone standing too near the edge. Or anyone standing at a place with a higher risk of anything disasterous happening to them. Like when you jay walk, or play with pen knives. *shudder* I have to let go and let God. seriously. Or i shall die at an early age from over excited neurons.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

my dream guy

Teehee, i'm coming up with a dream guy. Mind you, i'm being a tad fantastic here.
  1. GODLY. yeps. that says it all. I want someone who'll be willing to become a missionary with me.
  2. tall - i'm short, so in order not to have pixies for kids i shall marry TALL people:D
  3. smart - but not genius smart, they are always floating somewhere near heaven...
  4. Funny- my kind of funny!! wacky, sarcastic and... yeah!
  5. Into sports - i will NOT have a fat boyfriend... EW!!
  6. into drama - we shall be theatre buffs together!
  7. geeky - think immersed all day in books, dreamy and far-off
  8. rugged - he can go with me to climb random mountains all over the world!
  9. strong - i'm bound to bang into something larger than me, at the rate i'm going
  10. mature - but that'll be kinda irrelevant soon... i hope...
  11. Well brought up - i want a guy who opens doors for me, and lets me walk ahead!!
  12. Kind, nice and generous - i'm not referring to shopping... i'm referring to donation drives and what not. He WILL smile at the tin can holders! also, very importantly, he will be nice to maids.
  13. talkative - i can't quite decide which kind i'd rather have... but if he's talkative, he must let me talk too. hmm. that doesn't quite fit... is there moderate, anyone?
  14. good voice - so i can sing along with him SOFTLY and not hurt the eardrums of anyone sitting TOO close :P
  15. Good bod - not fat, not even very mascular... the lean wiry kind!
  16. OH, and BEEG eyes! Cos i don't have them.
  17. hmm. maybe hardworking too, so i can quit and become a taitai.
  18. romantic!! He can buy me roses at random intervals, or whenever i'm bored :) also, he can take me to quiet places where we can hold hands and listen to our thoughts. or something.

i can't believe this!! i can't even make it to a nice round 20... HMmm. i think there's more, but i've got amnesia and I FORGOT. so yeah, till i remember, this is it. Not a lot rite? quiet reasonable, too... :P

dreams

Yesterday, i was totally out of it, so i went to bed extra early, little dreaming that i'd dream, oversleep, and wake up feeling as if i'd spent the whole night somewhere far far away (in school, to be exact).
I think the most demoralizing dream one can ever have is that of school, as it simply brings home to sad SAD message that one doesn't have much of a life. Anyway, my dream came through as i lugged myself to school for physics remedial... which, as i predicted, was a total waste of time, because we just went through moments assignments, which i had conveniently left behind, thinking that we were going on to the new topic Heat.
OH, an read urban today. Or rater, flip hastely over the cover articles to the second last page, and snip out the little article on rockclimbing!! So now i don't have to tell you blankly that Climb Adventure is somewhere near keppel towers, because NOW u do have the address :) I'm going to go rockclimbing the minute exams are over, and train my arm muscles! hehe. I love climb adventure cos they have this little place with all the toughest bits of walls plastered everywhere, even the ceiling, so you can (or try to) clamber all around. For the most challenging rockwalls, however, i reccomend Safra Yishun, cos I tried the easiest walls, and i had hard time reaching the top (like seriously, i fell off 5 times). Climb adventure also has a very challenging wall (it slopes outwards at a 3o degree angle the minute you start, so you have to rest everytime you move up one handhold) but it doesn't have the luxury of space to have the number of walls that Safra has, nor does it have the real challenge of climbing under blazing hot Singapore weather. I MISS ROCKCLIMBING!! Actually, i miss working out, because i fear i am turning into a couch potato...*shudder*.
I think people who liked my other blog or duly horrified by this one... *cackles*
Yes, i actually am normal, and think about normal stuff like the weather, clothes, and hobbies.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

study group

I hate to do this to myself, but...
today was the first time i've ever studied in a group!!
Yups.
And it was suprisingly successful... at least more successful than when i study at home, or in the library. BUT, i think it would be lying to say that i was mugging all the time.
I finished 5 chapters of chem!! WHEEE. But i still have loads to go...
Tomorrow, i have physics extra lessons, and i am wondering whether 4 hours on one subject can be better spent else where. If the physics lectures are going to be anything like our physics lessons... i think i will bring my bio textbook there to study.
I shall expound on the complexities of the relationship between my class and our physics teacher. In character, she is a wonderfully forgiving and nice teacher who reminds me of a chirpy little birdy:) In appearance, she reminds me of a pregnant stick (think a small little bump). As a teacher, i think it safe to say: WHAT teacher? To quote my friend, "aiyah, i think she suddenly gets smart when she goes home or something, because she doesn't make SENSE now!" . And my friend isn't the mean kind. You really can't blame us when we say something like that, when we are constantly correcting her answers. If she weren't my physics teacher, she'd be the kind of teacher i'd SMILE at while walking past her. As it is, i bow very very low so she doesn't see my grimace.
Yong Zhi's going to turn this poem i wrote into a song!! Of course he's going to rip it apart, so if it goes horribly awry i can just blame him! But honestly, it isn't a really good poem, and i only showed it to Yong Zhi cos he wanted a love poem! Also because the poem was no longer relevant!

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

YAY, sam and fan sheng are coming to church on the 27th of nov!

friendship

Sometimes, i really don't blame people for shutting up to the world and ploughing through life, not heeding anything that goes by them. Yet at other times, I just want to stop and stare and admire all the beautiful things like friendship that go by.
I think i'm really fortunate in the department of friends. I've never been one of those popular girls with a bevy of assorted people trailing behind (like jamie yeo... i saw her at taka with a whole line of guys trailing "discretely" behind), but i've been blessed with at least one or two people at one time of my life (not counting my sisters, who are permanent fixtures in my life) who i've been able to talk to freely, and share the quiet corners of life with.
In my short journey of life, i've learnt that friends come in all shapes and sizes. Someone i never expected to like turns out to have a side of them that i love, admire and respect, and i can't help but want them to stay by me. I guess i'm a clinger, which is vaguely loserish, but i have realised that if I don't they'll slip by fast enough, and in the end, the one who will "lose out" is ME. Yet i also know that sometimes, it's just better to let go. It hurts less, and it's wiser, too.
There is this popular quote that goes somewhere along the lines of "everything has an expiry date". I used to scoff at it immediately, but now, i'm beginning to wonder. If i could modify the quote, i'll tag on this bit: " it depends on what ingredients you use". A friendship built on God, love, honesty and faith can never die. ANYTHING built on that can never die. I know i sound jaded, and idealistic. But my ideals haven't let me wrong so far, and till then, in God i will trust!
I believe that friendship is something you treasure, something you have to hold on tightly to, or else it'll slip away. Sometimes, friendship is something you have to fight for. And in rare cases, friendship is something you have to let go, because it's dragging you down.

bus ride home

The sky's this velvety blue tonight, jie, with just a hint of red over it, bits of sun that refuse to die. Just thought you'd like to know.
ANYWAY, on the bus ride home, there was this adorable, pretty little girl.
She was so adorable! She just grinned and grinned and grinned, at the world in general! She smiled so widely, i didn't believe her mouth could stretch any further until she laughed! I don't think i was that happy when i was at that age...
What i love about a smile is that it is contagious. Sitting there, looking at that carefree gladness of her, i couldn't help but feel my weary and burden-riddled heart give this little skip-jump of joy, too.
I think i know the secret behind a little girl's laughter. Each time their eyelids shutter, and they open their eyes again, the world greets them all over again. It's like playing pick-a-boo with a little child. No matter how many times you BOO them, they gurgle over in delight. That blip of a moment of darkness is enough to make them forget, so that when the light and colours pop back into their world, they are delighted all over again.
If there's one thing worth keeping from our childhood, i think it would be that exuberant joy, that total and complete trust in God, that everytime we open our eyes, the world will be alright. And even in times of darkness, we wait expectant, to greet the times of light and colour ahead with another smile, another shout of laughter.

flipping through the pages of the past

I've just been taking a walk down memory lane, reading my diaries.
What striked me most weree the entrees on all the camps that i have attended in my life.
Summer school, tacklecamp, Noxdern, OBS, SparkC, lifeskills camp (1 and2)... so many of them.
I find that in camps, you really learn alot about yourself, and about others. Because in camps, it's easier to be yourself, because you figure: Heck, what have i got to lose? And you do the most outrageous things that you would never even THINK of doing in your carefully constructed world back home.
I remember the most successful play that i'd ever acted in, not for the beauty of the script, but for the laid-back, natural and impromptu of it all. The play from summer school, based on the idiom "All that glitters is not Gold". To this day, i cannot believe that i actually dared to act as i did, casting myself on the floor and blubbering, and dancing the australian folk dance with that hideous GRIN that we were wearing. Even writing the script was enjoyable, something, i assure you, that i normally hate. The lines, the scenes all seemed to develop on it's own.
First there were three sirens and Odysseus, and then Odysseus turns into a wicked old man (because Tom is better at being wicked than anything else), who turned into a farmer, and then the three sirens became two (one went off to be the farmer's wife) and was joined by a guy siren (timothy, who could NOT be odysseus because he grins so affably at the world) who turned into prostitutes and a Mafia boss, respectively.
And then, from the farmer and his servile wife having a pitiful parting while he goes off to the city to find work it turns into the farmer abandoning his tired, frantic and slightly unstrung wife to go and play in the city. And of COURSE it was natural for the farmer to not know that prostitutes needed to be payed, and since we had a mafia boss, he could very conveniently be kicked around by all three of them, and sent running home to his wife (who all this while is having fits of hysterical weeping) who welcomes him back with open arms and dances with him. Oh, and we even got dark glasses for Timothy, so his grin could look vaguely sinister, since you couldn't see his eyes beaming at you. And Tom got to flick imaginery bits of soup and vegetable at me, while i tried valiantly to stop staring in lurid fascination at his maniacal glee, and look sad, horrified and angry. Now THAT is what i call acting. FUN!!!

Monday, September 05, 2005

dancing

Whee! i've caught the dancing bug from evelyn! I've just spent the last hour prancing around the house, and dancing to whatever song was playing on the radio! Heee. It's so fun! i just LOVE to go crazy! It's a really good form of stress relief, btw. I have decided. at the end of the year, DIRECTLY after exams, i shall learn hip hop and waltz! yay! My sister made me promise not to go near salsa and belly dancing though :P i wonder why.
So sad,it's too late for me to join ballet. :D nono, i'm kidding. BUt i do see why evelyn likes it so much. It's truly a skill, cos you have to be in control of your body, in order for you too look graceful.. believe me, i've tried. I remember our primary one ballet classes. All we did was touch our toes, TRY to do splits, do positopn one to ten and that was it. The only reason why i stayed on was because i liked the TuTu, but i quit in Primary 2 cos the teacher cast me as a boy in our performance! Imagine what i'd have been if i hadn't quit then... maybe i'd be learning pointe by now.. O.o I, however, cannot imagine myself in a leotard. Oh wait, i can. Cos a leotard is like a swimming costume. Well, in that case, i am not going near a leotard. EVER. ewewew. Now you know the second reason why i HATE swimming... other than the fact that it makes my skin feel dry, that is.

letting go

this is by far the hardest thing i've ever done, but it's a very very good form of discipline. I am trying to block out all thoughts of a certain someone who shall not be named for the sake of prying eyes who will be emotionally scarred for all eternity when i find out that they find out. All i can say is that i have to start disciplining myself all over again every 5 minutes, but i THINK i hit 7 minutes just now, while i was laughing over the gay spiderman emoticon on MSN. It's really really funny, but in the cheap-thrills kind of a way. At least it takes your mind off things, and lets you destress for as long as you keep laughing.
I went to the skin doctor today, and i spent $120 bucks on skin care products. It's kinda shocking, and makes me seem vaguely bimbotic, until you realise that half of that amount was spent on paying for eczema creams, so I am not vain. What IS proof of my vanity is the guess jeans i bought. But THAT was out of sheer desperation, as i don't think i'll be going to australia anytime soon.
You know, people in the fashion industry are doing the silliest of things. They are making jeans out of expandable material! I mean, how dreadful can THAT get? So you either buy these supertight suck-your-tummy-in-and-squirm-in jeans or you end up with loose pants that won't stay at hip level. It's a secret ploy to get us to invest in belts, i tell you. My lovely bubblegum jeans from australia, which fit perfectly SNUG when i first bought it, is now so loose, if i DON'T wear a belt... i can't jump. to put it simply. SO now i actually OWN a belt. Or rather, i have taken my mother's belt hostage.
Hmm. two songs are stuck in my head today, the first being The End of The World, that goes along the lines of WHY, does the sun, go on shining?? Which i learnt from my math teacher, btw. The second has a line in it that goes "cos i'll never be with you" STUPID radio, i am never turning it on again!!
I actually sound vaguely bimbotic and frivolous... you go girl!!

heys

YAY, i finally have started a blog about my life. Not a spiritual blog, like the one next door, but a heart to heart one just for you, jie! Of course there will be random pokey souls that sneak random peaks at this, but this is the closest and bestest thing i can come up with thus far!